Let Me Be The Light

A couple years ago,  I was walking the halls of the school where I work, mumbling this mantra again and again quietly to myself, “Dear Universe, show me where I can be useful, please let me be the light…”

I am a speech-language pathologist for little kiddos, a job which by all definitions is very useful. I help children find their voice, improve their communication skills, engage appropriately with their peers, and learn how to better comprehend language that is coming at them all day long. Yet for some reason I had this nagging feeling that I was meant to be doing something more. This restless feeling was nothing new for me. I have been there before. I have a strong intuition that I used to ignore, but over the years I have been honing it and tapping into it more and more.

The universe answered my call when a text from a friend led me to pursue a path in life coaching. It was through this path of becoming a certified life coach where I found my true calling and have been able to help people navigate the obstacles in their lives, emerging with more joy and a greater sense of knowing. I now see clearly how my own life struggles have been shaping me for this opportunity. (One of the many lessons I have learned on trusting that what is happening is meant to happen!) I have learned that being the light means showing your broken parts to whoever needs to see them, and that this can not happen without having first broken open myself. And being useful means using my past experiences and my present knowledge to help others who are also struggling. I hope to do this by sharing my story.

If you read my About Me section you can see how my story came to be. In a nutshell, after a very difficult divorce in my late 30’s, I remarried six years ago and my new husband and I “happily blended” our seven children, who ranged in age from 10 through 16 years old. The first thing people do when they find out we are a blended family is to exclaim, “Oh, you are just like the Brady Bunch!” My husband and I half-heartedly laugh because a) we have heard this like a million times, and b) because we hate to burst their bubble that we are nothing like the Brady Bunch. For starters we have seven kids to their six and we are missing the whole Alice live-in housekeeper. Oh my, how we are missing an Alice! Our lives are not perfectly orchestrated where every episode wraps up neat and tidy with a lesson learned and Mike and Carol sitting up in bed reading.

Our lives are messy and real. Over the past six years, my husband and I have navigated the many ups and downs of parenting seven teenagers, trying our best to do this with humor, compassion, curiosity, and most of all love- all while juggling work, co-parenting (or not) with our ex-spouses, and keeping up with the laundry and grocery shopping! We have celebrated countless joyful milestones including birthdays, high school graduations, proms, playoff wins, driver’s licenses, and college acceptances. We have also been there for the disappointments and lows of not making teams, painful breakups, failed classes, and being excluded from friend groups. We have sat at the 50 yard line and watched our son win his high school football Superbowl (twice!) and sat on the edge of a bed trying to get our daughter up as she battled her crippling anxiety and depression.

Over these years of working with children and parenting my own, I have learned many valuable lessons that encompass the heart of my goal as a life coach, including sharing the importance of communication, the art of listening, and how subtle shifts in mindset and perspective can make a world of difference. The purpose of this blog is to use my experiences and my insights (and lots of humor!) to share stories that may resonate with you, and that may give you hope and strength during difficult times. Parenting today’s teenagers is challenging and at times can feel very isolating, but I want you to know that you are not alone in your struggles. I also hope to provide you with practical suggestions that you can implement now to begin the process of lessening the chaos and increasing the peace in your homes. Please feel free to make comments and suggestions as to where I can be useful and I invite you to let me be the light on the days that you need it the most.

xo,

Joan